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Maybe It’s More Than Rules

This is a post I’d meant to post back in early 2022 but didn’t get to, so it’s rather old. However, it explains one of the biggest things I learned this year…

« I’ve been following all the rules for ‘building a great relationship with God’ but I haven’t found You. »

I wrote that today as I prayed. I was so lost + confused + scared. Grappling with the enormity of life, alone. I needed HIM. But I didn’t know how to reach Him. Where to find Him.

A few years ago I heard Godly men explain How to Build a Real Relationship with God. I excitedly grabbed the rules and began working on them, so excited to finally know how to do it and anticipating having a wonderful tie with God in a few years.

Today I realized I’m still at square one. All that diligent Bible-reading and church-going and scripture-memorizing and hymn-singing didn’t “do” anything. It just made me feel more spiritual. 

My attitude was very much a “check the box so it’s done so I can get the result” attitude. It was a “ok so if I do this then that will happen” attitude. A “I’m doing this because it’s my job + God expects it of me” attitude.

It was all about duty, not love.

I think of the Jews in the New Testament, following the letter of the law and not the spirit, setting unbearable burdens on each other and straying from what God really wanted—mercy and love and humility. Offering bulls and calves but with hearts far, far away.

I wonder if following the rules was the wrong mentality. I wonder if it was all a “my own strength” mentality, just hidden. A “I have to earn it” mentality. A “God expects me perfect before He gets close” mentality.

I wonder if building a relationship with God isn’t about ME following “the rules” but actually focussing on HIM. Loving Him. Discovering Who He is. Talking with Him for real instead of just following the “prayer rules.”

Being a Christian isn’t a set of rules. I know that. The New Testament is full of the reminder. But it looks like in my eternal quest for perfection, I turned “knowing Christ” into something like “being a good person so God likes me.”

Maybe there’s more to life than rules. Maybe it’s not about ME following the rules but me being totally empty and GOD filling me so much that I am like Him, therefore doing what is good. Maybe a relationship with God is actually about being with Him, and the “rules” were just to HELP me discover Him/be with Him. 

I’m not explaining it very well. But it makes so much more sense now.

Published by Katja L.

Hello! :) I'm Katja. I'm a Canadian bibliophile, book reviewer, writer, and child of God. I love too many things to name, but among them are chocolate, heirlooms, history, fancy handwriting, grammar & punctuation, laughter, tearjerking books, lists, organized bookshelves, pink roses, flowing skirts, hymns, and pretty much anything old-fashioned, beautiful, & classy.

2 thoughts on “Maybe It’s More Than Rules

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